It's a new year and a new shot at getting back to blogging....it's been pretty crazy lately thus the blogging has fallen by the wayside. So here is another shot...
Well needless to say plenty has gone on with the girls! The holidays were a blast, lots of family time, lots of presents...lots of me drinking because of all the extra family time...you know the typical holiday stuff. (I kid, I kid)
Piper really finally began to realize a lot more this holiday season so we had a great time with lots of different things i.e. elf on the shelf, decorating the tree, seeing Santa, making a list for Santa, Christmas goodies, making cookies for Santa, and of course...writing a letter to Santa after Christmas to inform him he forgot to bring two very important things she wanted, a kitchen with curtains, and the "Roger" movie, which I later discovered is in fact 101 Dalmatians, Roger is the owner of the male Dalmatian.
And yes, you read correctly, Piper did write a letter informing Santa he didn't bring her some things she thought he should have....nice kid....well played. Of course Piper also told me last night when I asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up, that she didn't want to be a doctor or lawyer or anything like that...nope....when Piper grows up, she wants...to be in charge. Fair enough...you are your mother's daughter for sure!
Maizy has really taken off, she is running everywhere, singing, talking and insisting just as much as her sister that we read to her. She enjoys crawling up on mom or dad's lap with her sister and having marathon book reading sessions, which is fantastic...that is unless all I want is a cup of coffee at 7am on a Saturday...
Traci took a new job this year at a Medical Malpractice Insurer out of Minneapolis, MN called MMIC. She seems to really be loving it, and the company seems great as well. I am really proud of her with the balancing act of running a firm and taking care of the girls, and then transitioning to a new job, shutting down her firm and still tending to the kids...I'm not sure what I was doing that whole time...probably eating a snack or playing Candy Crush. But in all seriousness, she's amazing and because of her we get to share in the adventure of raising two amazing children.
The holidays were great, in fact they were some of the best I can remember, seeing the girls surrounded by so much happiness and love really was amazing to be a part of, I hope everyone's holiday season was full of love as well.
So this is a short blog entry I know, but I am really hoping I can get it in gear and start blogging more! I promise...I'll try, it's just really hard to find the time to do this kind of stuff when you are as important as I am...I'm a big deal folks.
And remember, LIFE IS GOOD!
Piper and Dad
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Thursday, July 25, 2013
edit from previous post....because Traci told me to do it.
Ok so admittedly I left out some stuff from our adventure in KC yesterday...namely because it shows just how outgunned I am when it comes to my kids. Piper has a keen ability to steamroll me when left alone with daddy.
So the night before Maizy's cardio appointment we stayed at the Legends, we had dinner out with a close friend of Traci's, and her family, then we went swimming for a bit at the hotel pool. After we went swimming Traci headed over to Carter's to do some school shopping for Piper who starts preschool in the fall. Thus I had the girls for the rest of the evening...no problem...I got this....
Maizy was tired and a bit fussy, so I started giving her a bottle as Traci was getting ready to leave. Maizy wasn't having it, she didn't want a bottle, she wanted Mom. So Traci says "I'll just stay here, and shop another time." "No!" exclaimed "I can take care of this, it's under control." Famous last words...
So I ushered Traci out the door and went to turn on the TV for Piper. "Maybe we can find some cartoons, and after I put Maizy to bed we can play" I told her. "Ok, cool daddy" Piper responds. So I turn on the TV, and the screen says "No Signal." "What the hell?!?" I think. So I call down to the clerk to ask why the TV isn't working. It seems all of the cable at the Legends in KC is out, there is a cable guy on the way but he wasn't sure when he'd get there I am told by the clerk. "Awesome" I say, and hang up the phone. So I explain to Piper what is going on, "Ok daddy, let's just play then." Fair enough, so we start playing, at first Piper and Maizy were both dinosaurs and so they just roared at one another and laughed. I eventually found the Bubble Guppies theme song which both girls love, on youtube via my phone, so I played that for them on loop about 15 times.
After that Piper was certain Maizy was hungry, I was certain it was past Maizy's bedtime. So I am sitting on the bed with Maizy and I don't realize Piper has gone over and picked up a rather large bag of Cheerios that are for Maizy to snack on. All I hear is "Have some Cheerios Maize-dawg!" then a flood of Cheerios coming flying past me and completely cover Maizy. Yep, Piper had taken this large bag of Cheerios and dumped them all over her sister as she lay on the bed. "Piper! No!" I hollered...as I jump up from the bed I notice one thing...both girls are laughing, not just a chuckle, but hysterically laughing! I would like to think they were laughing at the Cheerios everywhere, likely they were laughing at me. So I start to pick up the Cheerios off the bed, which has now become a race between Maizy and I as to how fast I can pick them up, versus how fast she can jam them in her mouth.
All the while, Piper has now taken on the job of throwing things in the trash. "This place is a mess, I will clean up!" I hear her say. Cleaning up meant putting everything she could find in the trash, notably my phone, her sisters spoon, one of my shoes, and my wallet. I lean just so ever slightly off the bed to stop Piper from disposing of everything that we own, and Maizy decides this is the opportune time to try out her new "baby juke move" on dad. She proceeds to roll right under my arms...and off the damn bed. Thankfully she is talented enough not to land on her head, which she must have gotten from her mom, when I was a kid my head is what I used to cushion the fall for the rest of my body.
So of course I holler and pick up Maizy, who is now startled and crying, Piper realizes Maizy is upset and start's crying. I tell everyone to stop crying...so they cry louder. Mind you Traci has been gone...about 30 minutes.
So eventually I get everyone settled down, no one is hurt and we eagerly await mom's arrival back. I happened to get Maizy down right before Traci got back, so of course I look like Super Dad having gotten her to sleep in the pack-and-play, in the hotel room, with a 3 year-old bouncing around as well! Traci comes in and see's I have Maizy down, and I can only imagine is very impressed with my prowess as a father. That moment of triumph is quickly dissolved when Piper walks up and exclaims to Traci "Hi Mommy, daddy didn't pay attention and Maizy fell off the bed." What the?!?! She sold me out! I didn't tell mom you ate the rest of your bag of tortilla chips from Chipotle did I? NO! So what the hell man!?!
Traci looks at me and says..."one hour...I am gone one hour." "Yeah you were gone one hour" I say "And during that hour some shit went down in here." She just looks at me, shakes her head, and takes Piper in to brush her teeth.
Thankfully everyone was safe and relatively happy, there was little to no property damage, and no injuries. As a father...I call that a victory.
So the night before Maizy's cardio appointment we stayed at the Legends, we had dinner out with a close friend of Traci's, and her family, then we went swimming for a bit at the hotel pool. After we went swimming Traci headed over to Carter's to do some school shopping for Piper who starts preschool in the fall. Thus I had the girls for the rest of the evening...no problem...I got this....
Maizy was tired and a bit fussy, so I started giving her a bottle as Traci was getting ready to leave. Maizy wasn't having it, she didn't want a bottle, she wanted Mom. So Traci says "I'll just stay here, and shop another time." "No!" exclaimed "I can take care of this, it's under control." Famous last words...
So I ushered Traci out the door and went to turn on the TV for Piper. "Maybe we can find some cartoons, and after I put Maizy to bed we can play" I told her. "Ok, cool daddy" Piper responds. So I turn on the TV, and the screen says "No Signal." "What the hell?!?" I think. So I call down to the clerk to ask why the TV isn't working. It seems all of the cable at the Legends in KC is out, there is a cable guy on the way but he wasn't sure when he'd get there I am told by the clerk. "Awesome" I say, and hang up the phone. So I explain to Piper what is going on, "Ok daddy, let's just play then." Fair enough, so we start playing, at first Piper and Maizy were both dinosaurs and so they just roared at one another and laughed. I eventually found the Bubble Guppies theme song which both girls love, on youtube via my phone, so I played that for them on loop about 15 times.
After that Piper was certain Maizy was hungry, I was certain it was past Maizy's bedtime. So I am sitting on the bed with Maizy and I don't realize Piper has gone over and picked up a rather large bag of Cheerios that are for Maizy to snack on. All I hear is "Have some Cheerios Maize-dawg!" then a flood of Cheerios coming flying past me and completely cover Maizy. Yep, Piper had taken this large bag of Cheerios and dumped them all over her sister as she lay on the bed. "Piper! No!" I hollered...as I jump up from the bed I notice one thing...both girls are laughing, not just a chuckle, but hysterically laughing! I would like to think they were laughing at the Cheerios everywhere, likely they were laughing at me. So I start to pick up the Cheerios off the bed, which has now become a race between Maizy and I as to how fast I can pick them up, versus how fast she can jam them in her mouth.
All the while, Piper has now taken on the job of throwing things in the trash. "This place is a mess, I will clean up!" I hear her say. Cleaning up meant putting everything she could find in the trash, notably my phone, her sisters spoon, one of my shoes, and my wallet. I lean just so ever slightly off the bed to stop Piper from disposing of everything that we own, and Maizy decides this is the opportune time to try out her new "baby juke move" on dad. She proceeds to roll right under my arms...and off the damn bed. Thankfully she is talented enough not to land on her head, which she must have gotten from her mom, when I was a kid my head is what I used to cushion the fall for the rest of my body.
So of course I holler and pick up Maizy, who is now startled and crying, Piper realizes Maizy is upset and start's crying. I tell everyone to stop crying...so they cry louder. Mind you Traci has been gone...about 30 minutes.
So eventually I get everyone settled down, no one is hurt and we eagerly await mom's arrival back. I happened to get Maizy down right before Traci got back, so of course I look like Super Dad having gotten her to sleep in the pack-and-play, in the hotel room, with a 3 year-old bouncing around as well! Traci comes in and see's I have Maizy down, and I can only imagine is very impressed with my prowess as a father. That moment of triumph is quickly dissolved when Piper walks up and exclaims to Traci "Hi Mommy, daddy didn't pay attention and Maizy fell off the bed." What the?!?! She sold me out! I didn't tell mom you ate the rest of your bag of tortilla chips from Chipotle did I? NO! So what the hell man!?!
Traci looks at me and says..."one hour...I am gone one hour." "Yeah you were gone one hour" I say "And during that hour some shit went down in here." She just looks at me, shakes her head, and takes Piper in to brush her teeth.
Thankfully everyone was safe and relatively happy, there was little to no property damage, and no injuries. As a father...I call that a victory.
New Pics from KC.
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| Eating broccoli with chopsticks! |
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| Hanging out on the bench that we spent a lot of time visiting on last summer. |
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| Let's just check you out here sister. |
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| Just in case I need to do surgery |
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| Your eyes look good |
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| ears too! |
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| Cheers! |
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| Hanging out at the Filling Station Coffee Shop looking at her artwork. |
Cardio!!
Hello all!
Yesterday we were in KC at Children's Mercy for a cardio check-up for Maizy. The appointment was at 10:30, but they were running behind so it was roughly 11 before we were taken back to the room, where we then had to wait even longer for the echocardiogram. Admittedly I was waiting for some kind of meltdown to take place, especially since we had waited for roughly 1.5 hours from arrival to the time we got in for the echo...I was mistaken. The girls were fantastic...me well I was getting hungry/thirsty/and I had to potty!
Piper brought along her Doc McStuffin's doctor bag (that's probably not the technical term...don't judge me). She gave Maizy and I full check-ups. I got a clean bill of health from Dr. Piper, but I think she suspects some psychological damage but she wants to see me back in a week to truly determine that.
Before Maizy even had her echo Piper had informed us everything was just fine, Maizy's heart was good! And she was correct! The nothing has changed with Maizy's heart everything is functioning as it should! It was a huge relief, no matter how many times we have to do these check-ups it will always be nerve-racking. The Dr. told us that if in 6 months everything is good then we will be able to go to annual check-ups! Good job Maizy!
After the check-up we had lunch at one of Piper's old hangouts from when we were living in KC, Lulu's Noodle Shop! She of course had to check out the Koi pond, then we sat down for some lunch. Maizy was in a great mood and kept looking around, smiling and waving at everyone, she had a lot to be happy about! For those of you who are not aware, Lulu's has a nice gluten-free menu also!
So all in all everything is going great! The girls are keeping us busy/entertained of course. LIFE IS GOOD!
I will be getting pictures posted soon!
Yesterday we were in KC at Children's Mercy for a cardio check-up for Maizy. The appointment was at 10:30, but they were running behind so it was roughly 11 before we were taken back to the room, where we then had to wait even longer for the echocardiogram. Admittedly I was waiting for some kind of meltdown to take place, especially since we had waited for roughly 1.5 hours from arrival to the time we got in for the echo...I was mistaken. The girls were fantastic...me well I was getting hungry/thirsty/and I had to potty!
Piper brought along her Doc McStuffin's doctor bag (that's probably not the technical term...don't judge me). She gave Maizy and I full check-ups. I got a clean bill of health from Dr. Piper, but I think she suspects some psychological damage but she wants to see me back in a week to truly determine that.
Before Maizy even had her echo Piper had informed us everything was just fine, Maizy's heart was good! And she was correct! The nothing has changed with Maizy's heart everything is functioning as it should! It was a huge relief, no matter how many times we have to do these check-ups it will always be nerve-racking. The Dr. told us that if in 6 months everything is good then we will be able to go to annual check-ups! Good job Maizy!
After the check-up we had lunch at one of Piper's old hangouts from when we were living in KC, Lulu's Noodle Shop! She of course had to check out the Koi pond, then we sat down for some lunch. Maizy was in a great mood and kept looking around, smiling and waving at everyone, she had a lot to be happy about! For those of you who are not aware, Lulu's has a nice gluten-free menu also!
So all in all everything is going great! The girls are keeping us busy/entertained of course. LIFE IS GOOD!
I will be getting pictures posted soon!
Friday, July 12, 2013
Birthday party, swimming lessons, visitors
Hello all! I trust everyone is well out there. Things have been crazy/fun/exhausting...you know the usual.
We did have the girls birthday party recently, Piper's birthday isn't until July 15th, but we had a joint birthday party for them...and holy crap did they clean up...and now Traci and I are trying to find places to put all of the toys...I even suggested hiding some of them.
The party was a huge success, we had lots of family and friends come and visit, and a good time was had by all...especially Maizy and Piper. My brother and sister were able to come into to town to see the girls and stay for a bit. I am sure Piper wore out Uncle Derek and Aunt Heather! Many thanks to everyone that came to our party, it was a great time, and it reminded us just how lucky we are to have such amazing family and friends. It also reminded us just how lucky we are that Maizy gets to have a birthday. With the heart condition she had at birth she statistically should have been a miscarriage, in fact she had a 1% chance of making it, so needless to say dad had to try really hard not to lose it when everyone sang her happy birthday. Good job little girl, you've overcome a lot and we are so proud of you.
On a lighter note now...Piper has started swimming lessons, and she loves it! Piper loves the pool and water period, we are in our pool usually everyday and Piper thinks she's a mermaid...she says I'm King Triton...so I am cool with that...I have the huge muscles, I just need a big white beard and a golden trident and I will be good to go....alright...back to swimming lessons. Swimming lessons are about 30 minutes long and resembles what I can only imagine what herding cats looks like...if those cats were little kids and were in a pool. Piper is of course the smallest kid in the class so when they go into the training pool, which is deeper than the baby pool but not as deep as the regular pool, she has to hold on to the side of the pool or to her teacher. But she is having a great time learning to swim!
The garden is doing great as well, Piper loves the garden, I have to keep an eye on her to make sure she doesn't pick and eat everything. Very rarely do peas and tomatoes make it to the house. Shortly before the 4th of July our first tomato was ready to pick, she picked it and told me "this tomato is beautiful...I will eat it!" and with that she devoured then entire tomato. She didn't even offer me a bite, just a big toothy smile with tomato juice all over her face...that's pretty adorable kid...but next time I want a bite. I guess having a kid that loves veggies as much as Piper is a good problem to have! I think soon I will start a new type of blog post on the site. It will be recipes that Chef Piper and Chef Daddy make, see Piper loves to help cook and it's really a fantastic thing to do with your kids! You can instill in them healthy eating habits and they can spend some time learning about healthy food and how to prepare them. It also allows them time to have fun and pretend, Piper has her own little apron she puts on and she helps me make dinner in the evenings. It's a lot of fun and it allows us to help mommy a little when I am home...at least I think helps...hell we probably just make a huge mess, but the foods good. So keep a look out for some recipes!
Take care everyone! LIFE IS GOOD!
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Happy Birthday Maizy!
Today marks Maizy aka Maize Dawg's 1st birthday! One year ago today Team Ferrell was blessed with a strong little girl with a broken little heart. What year it has been for our family. As many if all of you know, we found out about Maizy's heart problem just shortly before she was born, and we also found out that we would need to deliver in KC at Children's Mercy. So last summer was spent living at The Ronald McDonald house while Maizy wowed everyone with her strength and courage. Shortly after she was born she had her open heart surgery and the rest is history. Since the surgery she's had an angioplasty to open up the area where they stitched in the donor tissue due to a little scar tissue build up. But other than that Maizy has continued to get stronger and healthier everyday!
The teeny tiny little girl with a feeding tube in her nose, now spends her days eating, jabbering and rolling all over the house. She also spends a lot of time trying to grab hold of Piper's hair, Maizy loves Piper very much, she also loves pulling Piper's hair. She sure does light up when she grabs a hand full of curls and yanks. Every once in awhile we get a little squeal from her as she yanks with all her might! Piper is a good sport, but she also gets her revenge in the form of wanting to play with whatever object Maizy has in her hand at any given time. It could be a live grenade and by God Piper is playing with that damn thing!
To all of you who have prayed, called, written, commented on the blog or facebook, or simply sent good vibes, mojo, karma, etc, I thank from the bottom of my heart, our whole family does. So many people have helped us in so many ways over this last year, especially when we were in KC. So to all of you to numerous to mention I say we love you all!
Also I want to thank Piper and Traci those two have been my rock. When times were tough in KC and I was worried about Maizy I always had Piper doing something crazy, or wanting to walk to the coffee shop, and never batting an eye at the unfamiliar place and circumstances she was apart of (I wish I could be so accepting and laid back) and I always had Traci to lean on. While I may not tell Traci this I couldn't have done it without her...well...literally I couldn't have done it without her...she gave birth to Maizy...I can't do that.
But in all seriousness the three girls I have been blessed with have made me the man I am today, I am ten-fold the person I was 10 years ago. Traci's patience, Piper's lunacy, and Maizy's constant infectious smile make my day better every single day of my life. I love them with all my heart, I am truly a lucky man. And to Maizy who overcame a 1% odd of making it out of the first trimester, I thank you for being a fighter, I thank your mom for being a fighter and an amazing mother, and I thank God for allowing me to be apart of all of your lives. And Maizy just like I told you right after you were born, and also whispered in your ear this morning, it still rings true today and everyday after "You fight like hell."
Happy Birthday Amazing Maizy we all love you!
The teeny tiny little girl with a feeding tube in her nose, now spends her days eating, jabbering and rolling all over the house. She also spends a lot of time trying to grab hold of Piper's hair, Maizy loves Piper very much, she also loves pulling Piper's hair. She sure does light up when she grabs a hand full of curls and yanks. Every once in awhile we get a little squeal from her as she yanks with all her might! Piper is a good sport, but she also gets her revenge in the form of wanting to play with whatever object Maizy has in her hand at any given time. It could be a live grenade and by God Piper is playing with that damn thing!
To all of you who have prayed, called, written, commented on the blog or facebook, or simply sent good vibes, mojo, karma, etc, I thank from the bottom of my heart, our whole family does. So many people have helped us in so many ways over this last year, especially when we were in KC. So to all of you to numerous to mention I say we love you all!
Also I want to thank Piper and Traci those two have been my rock. When times were tough in KC and I was worried about Maizy I always had Piper doing something crazy, or wanting to walk to the coffee shop, and never batting an eye at the unfamiliar place and circumstances she was apart of (I wish I could be so accepting and laid back) and I always had Traci to lean on. While I may not tell Traci this I couldn't have done it without her...well...literally I couldn't have done it without her...she gave birth to Maizy...I can't do that.
But in all seriousness the three girls I have been blessed with have made me the man I am today, I am ten-fold the person I was 10 years ago. Traci's patience, Piper's lunacy, and Maizy's constant infectious smile make my day better every single day of my life. I love them with all my heart, I am truly a lucky man. And to Maizy who overcame a 1% odd of making it out of the first trimester, I thank you for being a fighter, I thank your mom for being a fighter and an amazing mother, and I thank God for allowing me to be apart of all of your lives. And Maizy just like I told you right after you were born, and also whispered in your ear this morning, it still rings true today and everyday after "You fight like hell."
Happy Birthday Amazing Maizy we all love you!
Sunday, June 16, 2013
Being a dad
Once again its been a long time since I last posted a blog, all is well here with Team Ferrell, Piper and Maizy are both growing and gaining just like they should be (thanks to Piper getting rid of gluten in her diet!)
Todays post will be a bit different, as I will be updating again soon with updates about the girls and of course Maizy's upcoming 1st birthday! Yesterday June 15, marked the one year anniversary of our move to KC to await the arrival and subsequent heart surgery of our miracle Maizy.
But this post will be a bit different, this post in honor of Father's day will be a little different, it will be a little about and just a little about being a dad.
Too many times I turn on the computer now and hop on Facebook to see all sorts of ridiculous things people choose to share, and recently the ones that hit home are the ones about being a dad, or really a lack thereof. I don't know if it's an absence of fathers in many of our lives, but it seems that what should just be something a dad is supposed to do, or even just a parent should do, is now supposed to be some amazing accomplishment. You don't get a damn trophy because you make a half-assed attempt at caring for your children, and also children are children they are not interferences in your social life. Grow up, and by the way no one feels sorry for you because you had to have your kids this weekend thus you cannot kick it at the clubs. All you are doing is embarrassing yourself, man up and be a father.
But I digress...well for now at least. Really what this post is supposed to be is on how I am dad, what it means to me. Many of you know, and if you don't you sure do now, but my father in general was absent my entire life, he was an alcoholic that left when I was roughly 5 years old and with the exception of some Christmas holidays and birthdays, I nor my siblings ever saw him. I am now 33 years old, I have not seen my father since I was 16. Does he call...well he used to when he was drunk enough, but that's even stopped now. My father not only was absent but he never paid, albeit the rare occasion, any child support either, so my mother was forced to do it all on her own. Thus Father's day really didn't mean much to me for a very long time. Of course we would spend it with my grandfather on my moms side but other than that, Fathers Day was a non-issue, just another day.
As sad as that may sound to some it really was the best, had my father been present in my life I am almost certain I would not be where I am, nor the person I am today. Yet the absence of a father figure was tough, many missed opportunities but most important no example for me on how to be a father, or really for that matter a man. Most of the small amount I learned I got from my maternal grandfather. I thank him to this day for all he did for our family as we struggled through many trying times.
So how do you become a good father if yours was non-existent, how do you know how to be a man when the man who should be your main influence has made it very clear that you are not important. The answer is simply instinct, you just do it. You take care of your children because they are your children. Is it difficult to figure it out all on your own...you bet it is, and I have been lucky to have some good examples namely my grandfather and also my father-in-law. In essence my parenting is doing exactly the opposite of what my father did.
Everything changed when my children where born, life becomes about taking care of them, keeping them happy and making sure they are raised correctly. I have never felt love like the love I have for my children and the love they return to me. I feel bad on the rare occasion I think about my father because he missed out on so much not being around to raise his children. But that was his choice and his loss.
Being a father is single-handedly the most amazing/difficult/exhilarating/frustrating job, but it's worth every second when you come home from work and your little one comes running at you full speed to give you a hug, and tell you that they love you, and that they are so glad you are home. All I know is that I am single handedly the luckiest guy in the world, I am truly blessed. I have an amazing wife with two of the greatest kids in the world that teach me everyday what love truly is. If you asked the Justin at 23 if this is where he would be at 33...he certainly wouldn't think so, but the Justin now knows this is exactly where he should be, and I am so very thankful for all I have been through that got me to where I am today.
So fathers out there no matter the situation do the best by your children, and if the situation with mom is not good, don't let them see that. My parents made no secret of their disdain for one another, and it damages children when you do that. Dad's man up it's high time many of us started acting like dads. It's not easy, but you just do it.
Thank you Traci, Piper and Maizy for making me the dad/man I am today.
I love you more than you could ever know!
Todays post will be a bit different, as I will be updating again soon with updates about the girls and of course Maizy's upcoming 1st birthday! Yesterday June 15, marked the one year anniversary of our move to KC to await the arrival and subsequent heart surgery of our miracle Maizy.
But this post will be a bit different, this post in honor of Father's day will be a little different, it will be a little about and just a little about being a dad.
Too many times I turn on the computer now and hop on Facebook to see all sorts of ridiculous things people choose to share, and recently the ones that hit home are the ones about being a dad, or really a lack thereof. I don't know if it's an absence of fathers in many of our lives, but it seems that what should just be something a dad is supposed to do, or even just a parent should do, is now supposed to be some amazing accomplishment. You don't get a damn trophy because you make a half-assed attempt at caring for your children, and also children are children they are not interferences in your social life. Grow up, and by the way no one feels sorry for you because you had to have your kids this weekend thus you cannot kick it at the clubs. All you are doing is embarrassing yourself, man up and be a father.
But I digress...well for now at least. Really what this post is supposed to be is on how I am dad, what it means to me. Many of you know, and if you don't you sure do now, but my father in general was absent my entire life, he was an alcoholic that left when I was roughly 5 years old and with the exception of some Christmas holidays and birthdays, I nor my siblings ever saw him. I am now 33 years old, I have not seen my father since I was 16. Does he call...well he used to when he was drunk enough, but that's even stopped now. My father not only was absent but he never paid, albeit the rare occasion, any child support either, so my mother was forced to do it all on her own. Thus Father's day really didn't mean much to me for a very long time. Of course we would spend it with my grandfather on my moms side but other than that, Fathers Day was a non-issue, just another day.
As sad as that may sound to some it really was the best, had my father been present in my life I am almost certain I would not be where I am, nor the person I am today. Yet the absence of a father figure was tough, many missed opportunities but most important no example for me on how to be a father, or really for that matter a man. Most of the small amount I learned I got from my maternal grandfather. I thank him to this day for all he did for our family as we struggled through many trying times.
So how do you become a good father if yours was non-existent, how do you know how to be a man when the man who should be your main influence has made it very clear that you are not important. The answer is simply instinct, you just do it. You take care of your children because they are your children. Is it difficult to figure it out all on your own...you bet it is, and I have been lucky to have some good examples namely my grandfather and also my father-in-law. In essence my parenting is doing exactly the opposite of what my father did.
Everything changed when my children where born, life becomes about taking care of them, keeping them happy and making sure they are raised correctly. I have never felt love like the love I have for my children and the love they return to me. I feel bad on the rare occasion I think about my father because he missed out on so much not being around to raise his children. But that was his choice and his loss.
Being a father is single-handedly the most amazing/difficult/exhilarating/frustrating job, but it's worth every second when you come home from work and your little one comes running at you full speed to give you a hug, and tell you that they love you, and that they are so glad you are home. All I know is that I am single handedly the luckiest guy in the world, I am truly blessed. I have an amazing wife with two of the greatest kids in the world that teach me everyday what love truly is. If you asked the Justin at 23 if this is where he would be at 33...he certainly wouldn't think so, but the Justin now knows this is exactly where he should be, and I am so very thankful for all I have been through that got me to where I am today.
So fathers out there no matter the situation do the best by your children, and if the situation with mom is not good, don't let them see that. My parents made no secret of their disdain for one another, and it damages children when you do that. Dad's man up it's high time many of us started acting like dads. It's not easy, but you just do it.
Thank you Traci, Piper and Maizy for making me the dad/man I am today.
I love you more than you could ever know!
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